Chris and Muffin Joe's Game Reviews

Any questions or review ideas? Email us at cmjreviews@gmail.com

Friday, May 29, 2009

We're Back.

Hello again. Well, we've decided to come back. And we've realized something. What are the most entertaining reviews? The ones that are for crappy games. So, Chris and I have decided to change our reviewing ways. We from now on will only review the crappy games that everyone hates and wants to hurl shot glasses full of blood at. Hooray for mediocrity!

Friday, February 6, 2009

Go death yourself

On a thursday night.

Saturday, January 31, 2009

And the Winner is.....

The winner of the best game of January 09' is,

3. Star Ocean: Second Evolution

2. Skate 2

1. Mirrors Edge (P.C)

Friday, January 30, 2009

Who will win?

After hours of research and playing the games here are the #5 and #4 winners!

5. Elbits: The adventures of Kai and Zero

4. Moon (Nintendo DS)

Take a look tomorrow to see what is the best game in January 2009.

Friday, January 23, 2009

Top Game of January 09'

Now January seems to always be the worst month for video games. Right after Christmas and there is no point to buy games right after the holidays. But anyways here are the 5 nominees for best game of January of 2009.
1. Moon (Nintendo DS)
2. Elbits: The adventures of Kai and Zero (Nintendo DS)
3. Skate 2 (PS3 and X-Box 360)
4. Mirrors Edge (P.C)
5. Star Ocean: Second Evolution (PSP)

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Elder Scrolls Extravaganza!

Today I've decided to review Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind and Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion. Since Chris hasn't played either of these fine RPGs, he can't give them a score. Well, here we go.



Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind (Xbox version):

An awesome RPG for fans and newcomers. 9.5/10



So, here's the deal: If you like RPGs, Adventure games, or First Person Shooters, get it. This game rocks. You start off on a prisoner ship landing in Morrowind. The first ten minutes of this game is forced on you, but as soon as you step out of the census and excise office, you're free. You can do whatever the heck you feel like in this game. One of the biggest pros of the Elder Scrolls series is the fact that they can both suck you in and give you a gigantic world to explore. You can go make some potions, or free a slave camp, or become a serial killer and murder an entire village, which brings me to my first con. The combat in Morrowind is terrible. They should have made it turn-based, because the combat they went with stinks. You basically have to sit there and mash the right trigger, and almost every single one of your attacks misses somehow and doesn't even do anything. It's really annoying and makes fighting things a burden. Another problem with the game is that there's no fast travel, aside from teleportation, (which you have to be a member of the Mage's Guild to use,) and Slit Strider depots, which you have to pay to use. And my final gripe with this game is the fact that the loading times take forever. Every time you try to load a game from the main menu you have to wait a really long time before you can play. However, the good things about this game outweigh the bad things by a long shot. The bottom line is, if you want a good RPG for your xbox (if you're still playing original xbox games, like I am,) get it.

Pros:
Ultra freedom
Easy character creation
Tons of side quests
Graphics are good by xbox standards

Cons:
Crappy combat
Long load times
Occasional frame rate problems (something I didn't mention in the review.)
Why the heck don't any potions or plants work on my Nord character?
No fast travel or horses

Muffin Joe: 9.5/10
Chris: N/A


Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion

Hands down one of the best games for Xbox 360: 10/10

Oblivion is one of my favorite games on the 360. It is AWESOME! It basically takes everything that was great about Morrowind and makes it even better. The game is so humongous, and it sucks you in easily, forcing you to waste countless afternoons in Cyrodil. Often I came up from my basement to find it dark outside, wondering what had happened and how long I had been gone. If you own any system that Oblivion is available on, buy it. You won't be disappointed. However, tell your family and friends you'll miss them for a while.

Pros:
Almost everything
Graphics are awesome
Great gameplay
FREEDOM!!!!
Fast travel
Sucks you in
etc.

Cons:
Will ruin your social life
Some things are a little hard to get a hang of (i.e. alchemy.)

Muffin Joe: 10/10
Chris: N/A

And thus ends our Elder Scrolls Extravaganza. Tune in next time for our Orange Box Bash!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Its a Mario Party!

You guessed it, the Mario Party Special. So this is how it works I will go through each one of the 8, give it Pros and Cons, write a sentence or two about them and then a Score. If you have a problem with that then email us at cmjreviews@gmail.com
Mario Party is like a board game for N64, Game Cube, and Wii. There are tons of fun Minigames in each that you play after every turn.

Mario Party 1
The Birth of Mario Party. 9.5/10

Pros,
Birth of Mario Party
Good Minigames
Fun game boards

Cons,
It's the original so they had a lot of glitches they had to figure out
Not Many characters to choose from (Mario, Luigi, Wario, D.K., Yoshi, and Peach)

Chris: 9.5/10
Muffin Joe: 9/10

Mario Party 2
They worked out the glitches 8.5/10

This was really the start of Mario Party, they worked out the glitches and this is where Mario Party got off of the ground.

Pros,
Fun Character costumes
Good Minigames

Cons,
Same characters
Few Boards
You have to earn the minigames in party mode and then buy them to play whenever you want

Chris: 9/10
Muffin Joe: 8/10

Mario Party 3
Say Farewell to the N64 8.0

This one was actually pretty darn good although it did get a lower score than the others. This was also the last one of the Mario Parties to be on the N64.

Pros,
More characters (Daisy and Waluigi)
Good Boards
You don't have to buy the minigames!

Cons,
Adds to MP1 & 2 but kind of takes away from them

Chris: 8/10
Muffin Joe: N/A

Mario Party 4
Good start to the Game Cube versions of Mario Party 9.0

Now I haven't played this game enough to give it a legitimate review but what I do know is this:

Pros,
Took advantage of the Game Cube's better Graphics
Added a lot more minigames

Cons,
I haven't played it enough

Chris: 9/10
Muffin Joe: N/A

Mario Party 5
One interesting but good addition to the game. 9.5/10

What I mean by interesting is that they added an extreme bumper cars game to it. It isn't a minigame but I thought it was a pretty fun addition.

Pros,
Extreme Bumper Cars is pretty fun
good minigames

Cons,
This is where the game itself is just the same as the others except a few additions
Not much of a change

Chris: 9.5/10
Muffin Joe: N/A

Mario Party 6.
Same with #4 (I can't tell you a whole lot about it) 9.0

The only addition I saw with #6 is the addition of the microphone. I would need to play it again to give it pros and cons.

However, I, (Muffin Joe,) have played #6 plenty. I think that it is the best of the Mario Party series. I think that it has cool boards and that the microphone is an awesome addition.

Pros:
Night/Day feature is pretty sweet
Cool variation of characters
Mic is a good addition
Cool Boards

Cons:
This is the begining of the end for the Mario Party series

Chris: 9/10
Muffin Joe: 9.5/10

Mario Party 7
It starts to go downhill from here. 8.5

This is where the creators of Mario Party start to lose ideas. What I do remember from #6 is that one of the minigames was Lawn Mowing.

Pros,
Mic was a good addition
More characters
More minigames

Cons,
Losing minigame ideas
No good additions

Chris: 8.5/10
Muffin Joe: 8/10

The Mario Party 8 review is at the bottom of the January 09' page.

Rayman Raving Rabbids 2

Almost as disturbing as Wario Ware Smooth Moves. 7.5/10

This game is pretty good all arround. The games are a lot longer than the micro-games in Wario Ware, and most of them are pretty fun. It has a few Dance Dance Revolution type games in it also. The down side is that it takes about an hour to get all 50 of the games. You also need to do multi-player to get all of the games.

Pros,
Fun Games
Shooting & DDR games are fun
Rabbid customization is a good bonus

Cons,
Goes by way too quickly
Not as many games as some other titles

Chris: 7/10
Muffin Joe: 7.5/10

Wario Ware Smooth Moves

Yet another disturbing game full of other games. 8.5/10
Well this game can give you nightmares just looking at the front cover. No, this game is way fun and full of over 200 micro-games. These games go everywhere from nose picking to tail wagging to butt-slapping. This is a game that I highly reccomend.

Pros,
Lots of Micro-Games
Fun
Hours of entertainment

Cons,
Short story mode
Takes a lot of time and patiance to get all 200 micro-games

Chris: 9/10
Muffin Joe: 8/10

Star Wars Battlefront 1&2

Star Wars Battlefront Special!

Star Wars Batllefront is a war game where two teams go against each other. You can choose between CIS, Rebels, Empire, and Clones.

Battlefront 1
Pretty good war game if you like Star Wars 8.25/10
I personally think is 50Xs better than #2. Controlls are much less confusing, and you can actually see where you are going. There are quite a few places you can choose from including Naboo and Tatooine. You cannot use jedi which I think is a lot better because they are a cheap rip-off.

Pros,
Fun
Good Characters to choose from
Good Machines (ships)

Cons,
-------

Chris: 8/10
Muffin Joe 8.5/10

Battlefront II
Not as Good as #1. 6/10
This game does what NFS Underground does, it adds on to #1 but it doesn't make it better. There are Jedi and I think they are a complete rip-off. Controlls are WAY better. So on So forth.

Pros,
Adds on to #1
Jedi

Cons,
Doesn't improve on #1
Controlls are way too confusing

Chris: 4/10
Muffin Joe: 8/10

American Idol (GBA Version)

A crappy game that is nothing like the show 1.5/10

If you are going to get an American Idol game, get the one where you actually sing. This game is so bad the singer sounds like one of the 100,000 people that get made fun of by Simon, Randy, Paula, and now Kara. This game is a crappy rip-off of Guitar Hero, it tells you the song but the graphics are so bad you can't read what it says. Good for a laugh but that's about it. They really should have named this game "American Idle"

Pros,
Funny

Cons,
Everything

Chris: 1.5/10
Muffin Joe: 1/10

Tecmo Bowl (Virtual Console on Wii)

Tecmo Bowl on Virtual Console: 7.5/10

So, recently I got a Wii, and Chris and I were wondering what to spend 500 points on, so we were looking through the shop channel, and we found......"TECMO BOWL!" So, we read some reviews, watched some gameplay videos, and decided to spend our five bucks on it. It was a pretty worthwhile purchase. The controls are simple, and so is the gameplay, meaning you don't have to coach an NFL team to play it, but the lack of plays make it feel like it was made for 5 year olds. The graphics are so crappy that the teamates who are supposed to be black are purple, and there is a really annoying flicker effect that almost had me on the floor having an epileptic seizure. However, the game is pretty good, and it is worth your five bucks because the gameplay, although simple, is fun, and multiplayer is a blast, but coach mode is worthless. So, the bottom line is: If you want a good laugh and you're looking for a good NES game on Virtual Console, this game is a good one to get.

Pros:
Fun Gameplay
Simple Gameplay
Good Value
Fun Multiplayer
Hilarious Half-Time Show (Hello pixelated babes!)

Cons:
Crappy sound effects (what do you expect, it's an NES game.)
Crappy graphics that are unrealistic and flickery
Coach mode sucks
Simple Gameplay

Chris: 7.5/10
Muffin Joe: 8/10

Need For Speed Special!

Today I am doing a review on Need for Speed Underground 1&2, Most Wanted, Carbon, and Pro Street.
Now if you are wondering which Need for Speed game you should get look at how Muffin Joe and I rank the 5.

5. Need For Speed Pro Street
Terrible addition to an awesome series.3/10
Need for speed Pro Street is a LEGAL street racing game. No cops, no wandering around the city just racing in 1970's cars. Wow, try again NFS.

Pros,
Okay cars
Free Race is pretty good

Cons,
Career mode is not possible to beat
Career mode is boring
Legal Street racing
Just about everything else

Chris: 3/10
Muffin Joe: N/A

4. Need for Speed Underground 2
Adds on to Underground, but takes away for the most part. 5/10
Don't get me wrong on this one, this game is pretty good with the addition of free roaming. The only issue with that is that there are no cops, that is okay though because the addition of cops came in the 05' Most Wanted. This was the 04' NFS. Now this game is basically a copy of Underground when it comes to racing. Good but I know they could have improved.

Pros,
Free roam
Good Cars

Cons,
Copies Underground
Free roam is semi-pointless
Your friends are a little cheesy

Chris: 5/10
Muffin Joe: N/A

3. Need for speed Carbon
Mix between Underground and Most Wanted 5/10
If you are a beginner at this game don't worry, at the beginning if you get in a cop chase you have to touch the cops to immobilize them. It goes from way easy to way hard a little quicker than what you would hope for.

Pros,
Cars (just like always)
Easy to begin with
Gets addicting after a while

Cons,
Doesn't improve on Most wanted at all
Pointless story

Chris: 6/10
Muffin Joe: 4/10

2. Need For Speed Underground
Good start to a good series. 8/10
This game got a better score because it was the birth of the Need for speed series. All around it is pretty good. The races are good, career mode is fine. All around a good game. In career mode you are just supposed to get the nicest, fastest car, and you need a good reputation.

Pros,
Cars
Good races
Lots of races
Difficult to beat

Cons,
No free roam
Not the most addicting game

Chris: 8/10
Muffin Joe: N/A

1. Need for Speed Most Wanted
Best of the NFS series BY FAR. 9.5/10
There is no question that Most Wanted is the best addition to the NFS collection. First of the series to involve the cops. In this game it has a stupid story. That is the only down side. You race the 15th on the blacklist (Razor Callihan) and he messes with your car and he steals it and that is your only motivation to get to the top of the blacklist. Other than that the game is awesome.

Pros,
Cheesy cut scenes are funny to watch.
Best NFS
Lots of freedom
Lots to do
Fun Races/Events
Awesome Cop chases

Cons,
Stupid story

Chris: 10/10
Muffin Joe: 9/10

Thank you for surviving our Need for Speed special. If you want us to do any more specials please email us at cmjreviews@gmail.com

Friday, January 16, 2009

Mario Kart Wii

Pretty good: 7.5/10
Mario Kart Wii is an excelent addition to the Wii console. With 4 player mode and 2 player Wi-Fi mode you can race with people 5 feet away from you or half way arround the world. There are many good characters to choose from including your Miis. If you don't like the Wii wheel then you can also use the Game Cube Controller, Nunchuck, or the Wii Classic controller.

Pros,
Wi-Fi Connection
Lots of characters
Lots of good tracks including classic tracks from the SNES, Game Cube, N64, Nintendo DS, and GBA
Lots of controllers you can choose from
Mii use (Muffin Joe loved this and constantly gave his friends nightmares using his disturbing Miis)

Cons,
Muffin Joe sucks at it and gets 12th every time
Wii wheel is a little hard to control (when you get a hang of it, then it isn't too bad)

Chris 9/10
Muffin Joe 6/10

Mario Party 8

Disappointing: 6/10
Well out of all of the Mario Party games, I have to say this was the most disappointing. For the Wii I thought this game would be awesome, but I stand corrected.

Muffin Joe thought differently though giving it an 8/10.

Pros:
Minigames are okay
large variety of characters to choose from
Mii applicable

Cons:
Story mode makes no sense
Party mode gets old fast
Minigames go by way too quickly and get old fast

Chris: 4/10
Muffin Joe 8/10